Hundred Reasons Read online

  I nodded and motioned for him to come inside. This was a rare occurrence. It wasn’t often that I had to summon my brother. He almost always spent his days working right beside me, but today, he’d been busy putting together the formal offer for Tanner Bikes.

  “What’s up?” Samson asked, falling into his usual chair.

  My stomach turned over as I looked at his hopeful face. Ever since we talked about Tanner Bikes that night in my driveway, he’d been moving full steam ahead. I’d never seen him work so hard for something in his life.

  “I talked to Alex this morning,” I said.

  Samson’s eyes widened. He sat up in the chair and leaned forward, a smile already spreading across his face. He thought it was good news.

  “Don’t get excited,” I said quickly. “It didn’t go well. She shot me down.”

  “What?” Samson blinked. “I don’t understand. We haven’t even issued the offer yet.”

  “I know.”

  “Then, why did you go talk to her?”

  “Because I ran into her last night,” I said. “She’s been working at The Diner down on the beach. Waitressing.”

  Understanding passed through Samson’s eyes. He sighed and shook his head. The emotions of business had always hit him harder than me, but this time, I felt the exact same way he did.

  “God, that sucks,” Samson said. “She’s trying so hard to keep the shop.”

  “But she can’t.” I shook my head. “The bank is days away from seizing the property.”

  “I know,” Samson said. “I just talked to Barry about an hour ago. They gave her until Friday.”

  “Friday?” That was sooner than I realized. “Jesus. Three days is nothing.”

  “What did you offer her?” Samson asked. “Why didn’t you let me go with you?”

  “Because I thought we could work something out,” I said. “Alex and I, we’ve run into each other a few times lately, and I don’t know, man. I just thought she’d listen to me.”

  “How much?” Samson asked.

  “How much what?”

  “Money,” he said. “How much money did you offer? We decided on about -”

  “I didn’t,” I said. “We never even made it that far.”

  “Then what was the offer?”

  “I offered to buy the property and keep it a repair shop,” I said. “I told her we don’t want to renovate and sell, and we want to own it as it is.”

  “Let me guess, she hated that idea even more,” Samson said.

  “I don’t think so,” I said. “She thanked me for the offer, especially after I told her we’d keep her on as a manager.”

  “She thanked you?” Samson’s eyebrows shot up. “That doesn’t sound like the woman who attacked us in this very office.”

  “She didn’t attack us,” I said defensively. “She was just upset. Her entire livelihood is being threatened. Trust me, you’d be upset too.”

  “I don’t blame her,” Samson said. “I can’t picture her being gracious, though.”

  “Well, she was,” I said.

  “But that didn’t stop her from saying no,” Samson said.

  “No.” I leaned back in my chair. “It didn’t.”

  Samson nodded and stood up. He paced slowly around my office. With every step he took, his disappointment became more obvious. I didn’t realize how hard it would be for me to see him this way.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I know how much you wanted this.”

  He shrugged and kept pacing. I watched him for a few minutes and then looked away. He wasn’t the only one feeling defeated. I never wanted to own a repair shop, especially not one tucked away behind an old abandoned warehouse. What I wanted, though, was to be in Alex’s life.

  “You okay?” I asked, shaking my thoughts of Alex away.

  “Yeah.” Samson shrugged again. “It’ll be fine. There are a thousand other properties out there, right?”

  “Exactly.” I tried to smile, but it was pointless. No amount of optimism was going to make either of us feel better about the failure.

  “You think there’s a chance she might change her mind?” Samson asked.

  “I don’t know.”

  It seemed like an impossibility. Alex was stubborn, more stubborn than anyone I’d ever met. When she made her mind up about something, that was it. I’d seen her on and off for weeks and she never once wavered in her resolve. I couldn’t imagine she would start now.

  “We can always buy it at auction,” Samson said. “That was the backup plan anyway, right?”

  “Right.”

  Samson seemed to take comfort in that fact. Within seconds, he’d bucked up to his usual self. His step became lighter, and his eyes regained their youthful exuberance.

  “I’m gonna get back to work,” he said. “We should start preparing for auction now, so we’re a leg up when it happens.”

  “Sure.”

  Samson grinned and hurried through the door. I watched him go with a pit in my stomach. He was so excited at the prospect of owning Tanner Bikes, and despite Alex’s refusal, there was still a good chance he would get his wish.

  But me, the idea of snaking the property at an auction felt dirty. Wrong. Like I was betraying Alex in a deeply hurtful way.

  It didn’t make sense. I couldn’t count the number of properties I’d bought through an auction. There had been so many over the years that it was just business, just something we did. This was different, though. This wasn’t just a property. It was Alex’s property, the property she’d already told me I couldn’t have.

  How could I go behind her back and buy it anyway? How could I wait until she’d lost it, until she was miserable and defeated, until her heart was broken, to pounce?

  It felt like taking advantage, and in a way, it was. No matter how many times I told myself it was just business, that I would do this to anyone, it still felt wrong. When Samson came back with his outlined plan, I fought the urge to rip it to shreds.

  I’d barely sat down at my desk the next morning when my door opened a crack. My secretary poked her head inside with a nervous smile.

  “There’s someone here to see you,” she said.

  “Who?” I frowned and glanced at the clock on my desk. It wasn’t even eight o’clock.

  “Alex Tanner.”

  What the hell? I cleared my throat and jumped to my feet. I nodded once and watched as the door opened farther, and Alex stepped inside.

  She smiled at me, her cheeks flushed pink. She was wearing nicer clothes than I’d ever seen on her. Her jeans weren’t grease-stained, and they didn’t have a single hole. They were painted on her body, leading down to a pair of ballet flats that looked weirdly delicate on her feet. Her blouse was green and flowed down over her jeans effortlessly. It brought out her eyes so much that I had to look away to stop myself from staring.

  “Alex,” I said. “Please, sit down.”

  “Thanks.” She smiled again and sat on the edge of a chair. She glanced around the room, clearly uncomfortable.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked. “I mean, sorry. I’m surprised to see you.”

  “I’m a little surprised to be here.” She laughed. “I wasn’t sure I was going to come.”

  “Why did you?” I asked.

  “Because I’ve been thinking a lot about your offer,” she said slowly.

  “Oh?” I sat down in my chair and leaned forward over my desk.

  “I haven’t changed my mind,” she said quickly. “Don’t get too excited over there.”

  “I’ll do my best.” I smiled.

  She smiled back and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. I swallowed hard and tried to keep my mind focused on our conversation. Was it possible that a miracle had happened?

  “I’m not prepared to let you buy the shop,” Alex said. “Not when I know your motivation is to help me.”

  “What?” I blinked. That wasn’t at all what I’d been expecting.

  “I know why you offered that deal
,” Alex said. “You want to help, and while that’s nice, it’s too much. I don’t like charity, and I hate pity.”

  “Alex,” I said with a soft laugh. “It’s not charity. This is a great business opportunity.”

  “That may be,” Alex said. “But can you honestly tell me you would have offered this deal to anyone else?”

  I looked down at my hands. The truth was, Samson was prepared to offer this exact deal weeks ago. The first time he stepped foot in that garage, he was ready to do whatever it took to buy the shop. But that wasn’t Alex’s question.

  She didn’t ask what Samson would have done. She asked about me.

  “No,” I said. “If it were my decision, I wouldn’t have offered to keep you on as a manager.”

  “Then, why did you?” she asked.

  “I wanted to help,” I admitted with a sigh.

  “Exactly,” she said. “And I can’t let you do that.”

  “I understand,” I said. “But that brings me back to my first question. Why are you here?”

  “Because I thought of a solution,” she said. “A different deal.”

  That caught my interest. It wasn’t often that someone came back with a counter deal. I’d grown accustomed to getting what I wanted in the business world.

  “Go ahead,” I said.

  “I want to work for you,” she said. “Here. At your company. I’ll do whatever you need done. Secretarial work. Location scouting. Any and everything short of sex.”

  “Sex?” I laughed. “Really? Is that what you think of me?”

  “I just had to put it out there,” she said. “So you knew that was off the table.”

  “Message received.”

  I tried not to laugh again. Alex’s expression was beyond serious. She stared at me with her green eyes wider than I’d ever seen them. In that moment, I let the thought of sex enter my mind for the first time. The idea of being with her, in that way.

  “So?” she asked. “What do you think? Do we have a deal?”

  “Well, let me make sure I understand,” I said. “You want me to give you the money for the shop, but only if I also let you work for me here?”

  “Exactly,” she said. “And, I’d like the shop to stay in my name. Stay mine. Basically, you’d give me the money and I’d work it off.”

  “Like a loan?” I frowned.

  “Kind of, I guess.” Alex nodded.

  “And you’re sure about this?” I asked. “Because, you don’t have to work for me, Alex. That’s not what I -”

  “If I don’t, it’s too easy,” she said. “I need the money. We both know that, but I won’t let you dig me out of this hole without earning it first. And I can’t stand the idea of losing my stake in the shop. If you just buy it, then I lose that.”

  I nodded and stood up slowly. I walked around the desk and extended my hand for her to shake. She smiled and took it.

  “I’ll come by the shop tomorrow,” I said. “I know the bank only gave you until Friday.”

  “Thank you.”

  Alex stood up and stepped forward. Before I knew what was happening, her arms were around my waist. I froze for a split second. My body took over while my brain spun out of control. I hugged her back, leaning into her and letting the smell of her hair overwhelm me.

  I don’t know how long we stood there. I lost track of the time as the feel of Alex in my arms overtook everything else. My arms tightened around her, and her hands rested gently against my back. It had been years since a woman hugged me like that.

  When she finally pulled away, she tucked her hair behind her ears and looked at the floor. She was embarrassed, but I barely noticed. I fought the urge to hug her again, to pull her back into my arms and not let her go.

  “Um,” she said. “Thank you again.”

  “Of course.”

  She smiled that same nervous smile from before, her eyes flickering between my face and the floor. I watched her leave with my head still spinning from the smell of her hair.

  28

  Alex

  Declan’s body was harder than I imagined. I could feel his muscles bursting through this shirt. When his arms wound their way around me, my breath caught in my throat. I let my hands fall open on his back, my fingers itching to roam over every inch.

  I came to my senses with a jerk. Pulling away from him was hard. My head was spinning, and the smell of his cologne was still in my nose.

  I cleared my throat and took a step back. My cheeks were flushed as I tucked my hair behind my ears and tried to look up at him. Meeting his icy blue gaze was impossible. My eyes flickered between his face and the floor.

  The longer I stood there, the more embarrassed I became. I said goodbye and hurried from his office, flying down the hall as fast as my legs would go.

  It didn’t make sense. My sudden surge of emotion toward Declan was nothing short of ridiculous. I felt like a vapid school girl, all atwitter over some hunky football player. I half ran to the parking lot and threw myself behind the wheel of my car. It wasn’t until I made it back to the shop that I finally calmed down.

  I shook off my embarrassment and went inside. Declan didn’t care about the hug. It didn’t matter that I’d never in my life hugged a man like that before. It didn’t matter that my skin felt hot when I thought about it. All that mattered was that the deal was done. Declan agreed. We shook on it. Everything was finally going to be okay.

  “Hey,” Garret said when I stepped inside. “Where have you been?”

  “Renegotiating,” I said simply.

  “What does that mean?” Garret asked. “Did you talk to the bank again?”

  “No.” I shook my head. “I went to Gamble Realty. I talked to Declan.”

  “You did?” Garret was so shocked that he actually laughed out loud. Shaking his head, he stared at me with amused disbelief. “Well, damn. That’s good, I guess?”

  “I think so.” I nodded. “It’s not ideal, but it’s the best option we have. This way, we can keep the shop. Declan agreed to give me the money, so I can pay the bank.”

  “He did?” Garret frowned. “Why would he do that?”

  “I offered to work for him at the realty company,” I said. “And, he may want a cut of the shop’s profits, or maybe interest on the money, I don’t know. He said he’d come by to iron out the details and give me the money.”

  “I like it.” Garret grinned. “This is amazing. We need to celebrate! Call your mom.”

  “Actually.” I cleared my throat. “I was thinking about taking today off. I want to ride down to the cemetery. Spend the day with Dad.”

  Garret nodded and smiled sadly. He pulled me in for a bone-crushing hug and then sent me on my way. I grinned at him one last time before I hurried outside and jumped in my car.

  I didn’t want to take my car to see Dad. It felt wrong. Instead, I went home and got my bike. I left my helmet off and let the wind whip against my face and blow my hair in knots and tangles. I didn’t care that it was unsafe. I didn’t care that it would take me hours to brush my hair out later. All I wanted was to feel connected to my dad, and this was the best way to do that.

  When I reached the cemetery, I walked slowly through the rows of headstones. It always felt surreal being here to visit my father. It was like I’d stepped out of my skin and into someone else’s. Nothing about this felt like reality, at least not mine. Even months later, it couldn’t be possible that my dad was really gone. The idea that I would never see him again.

  I had to stop and catch my breath. Thinking that way always pulled me up short. No matter how much I knew the truth, I had never been able to fully accept it. Never seeing my father again wasn’t possible. It was too horrible, too unbearably sad. Instead, I liked to tell myself he was still here. Every day. Circling around me in a mist that I just couldn’t see. Somehow, that helped me get through the days.

  At the very least, it propelled me forward to his gravesite. When I reached it, I ran my hands over the dark grey stone and traced the let
ters of his name with my fingertips. His birth and death date were carved right beneath and at the very top were the words my mother had chosen so carefully just five months ago.

  “He made it through life with love, a lot of compassion, and a little grease under his fingernails.”

  Few people would understand that quote unless they knew my dad. It wasn’t the typical words you found on a headstone but for him, it was perfect.

  I stared down at the headstone for a few seconds, wondering if I should have brought flowers with me. All the other graves had bright colors surrounding them, but Dad’s was different. It stood alone amongst a sea of green grass.

  No, I thought. He would’ve hated the flowers. This is Dad. Solid. Strong. Independent. All the things I wished I’d gotten from him.

  “Hey, Dad.”

  I sat down on the damp grass and leaned back against the hard stone. Whenever I saw people sit like this in movies, I always wondered why. It couldn’t possibly be comfortable to sit with your back pressed against a rock that was hard and hot from the sun. But, after my dad died, I finally understood.

  The comfort I used to feel around my father seeped through that stone. It warmed my back and then spread to my entire body. A few seconds there was all I needed to start feeling better.

  “I’m sorry I haven’t been by in a while.” I spoke softly and stared up at the sun. “Things have been hard.”

  Tears pressed against the back of my eyes. I blinked hard and fast, refusing to let them spill. This visit wasn’t about crying. I’d cried against that headstone more times than I could count, but this visit was a celebration.

  “I almost lost the shop,” I told him. “The bank gave me until Friday, and honestly, I didn’t think—It didn’t seem like I would find a way out. I didn’t have the money. I still don’t. But something happened.”

  I shook my head and looked down at the trees around me. This cemetery was beautiful. It almost seemed ridiculous for a place like this to be so pretty. After all, only dead people lived here. I always thought it was a waste, but as I sat there talking to my dad, I was grateful for it. It was the kind of place that could make you believe in miracles.